Happy New Year 2017

It’s a few days into 2017 and I hope everyone is having a better start than I am. Then again, I think my body is sick (literally, I’ll explain in a sec) of carrying around all this crap inside and has decided to purge. I literally carried nothing from 2016 with me into 2017. Let me explain.

On Friday, Dec 30 around 11 pm I started to not feel so great. I was at a friend’s house with my sister and I figured while they were talking I’d close my eyes. Maybe that would help me feel better. Well it didn’t. My sister and I left a little after 11. I got home went to bed. Everything seemed OK at that point. 2 am rolled around and everything was not so OK anymore. My stomach decided there was an evil demon lurking inside and it needed to come out. Not just through my mouth, but my nose as well. Yes people, I had, what is now being referred to as popcorn balls, coming out of my nose and settling into my sinuses. The pain is real my friends, the pain is real. Thank goodness the nose thing only happened once. I was scared to let anything come out after that, but it did. So, this whole evil demon that was lurking in my stomach lasted 3 hours. Yes, 3 hours of this. Once it stopped, I was able to sleep…….For a few hours. Then I needed to get up and get ready to go to the Jeff Dunham show that started at 3 on Dec 31. My new best friend this day has a name and that is Pepto. Pepto was my new bestie for New Year’s Eve. I went to the show with my sister, nephew, and friends. I did feel OK during the show so that was a plus. It was a great show too, as always.

My New Year’s Eve was spent passed out, like most of you I’m sure, only I was out at 7pm. A few text messages came through around 8-9:30 and I was out for the rest of the night. I managed to stay asleep until 1:30-2am. I then woke up for  a little while then passed back out. Yeah, New Years weekend was not a good one for me. But, I did purge all of 2016 out and literally started the new year fresh.

So, I felt like crap all weekend. Then Monday rolls around and I feel like crap even more. Only, now I’ve started with this cough. Tuesday, the cough is getting really bad but I went to work. I just thought OK, bad cough, no biggie. Tuesday night went out with a friend to dinner and catch up. Felt like crap. Got home and decided to take my temp. 101.3 is what the thermometer read. Yep, I think I’m sick. I picked up some Theraflu which helped me sleep and calmed the cough. Stayed home from work on Wednesday and slept almost the entire day. Took my temp again and was at 101.4. Guess I need to call the doctor.

Today, I go to the doctor. They weren’t sure if it really was the flu but asked if they could do the test because of my symptoms being a little different, they could have a base for what to look for if I really do have it. OK, sure why not? Go for it. Why in the world did I say OK to this?! If you have never had that done before, it fucking hurts. Seriously, I think it hurt just as bad as when the popcorn balls were shooting out of my nose. It was horrible. My eyes watered for about 10 minutes. My nose wouldn’t stop draining. I was already a mess, this made me an even bigger mess. So, the test came back positive for influenza type a. Great, I was the lucky one who made my doctor the winner in his yearly “Who is going to have the first positive flu case” bet. You’re welcome doc. On top of that, I decided to let them update me on the tdap shot for my trip to Peru in May. I could’ve waited but since I was there and they said it’s OK to do even with the flu, let’s do it. Yeah, that shot can make you feel really bad, and as I type this up, my arm is really sore. Hey, why not just add to the mess, right?

By now, we know when the shit hits the fan in my life, it’s mounds of elephant shit hitting the industrial size fan. You’ll be picking shit out of every nook and cranny you can think of and even out of places you didn’t know existed. But hey, the only way to go from here is up, right? I purged all the bad and rid myself of all the negativity. I am ready for 2017 to get into full swing. I mean, you can’t really get any worse than bringing in the new year shooting popcorn and who knows what else, out of your nose and mouth at the same time. Everything else is a piece of cake. Yes, I said it.

So, here’s to 2017. I wish you all the best in good will, fortune, health, and love in this new year. May it be full of joy, laughter and love. Bring it on 2017. BRING. IT. ON!

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